Why your “victim” mentality could be SERIOUSLY holding you back



First off I want to say I know everyone has things going on. Some more serious that others, and I am in no place to judge anyone by the things they have to deal with.

But the fact is everyone has struggles, everyone has adversity, everyone has fear, barriers and doubt – but how do we manifest that into a positive outcome?

Simple, you need to change your MINDSET to “by me” instead of “to me”.

What does that mean? Let me explain.

So, BY ME is a state of mind that creates victimisation of oneself or the situation surrounding you. Believe me when I say this is very common and happens everywhere around us – think of the media for example.

How many times do we hear of a horrible situation that creates a sense of feeling that things are happening “to a victim”.
In no way am I saying these situations aren’t horrible, what I am saying is these situations of sympathy for situations are fed to us again and again.

This then transcends into a belief that whenever something goes wrong in your life or you are up against adversity, it is happening TO YOU, not BECAUSE OF YOU.

We’ve all heard it right – “oh I have such rotten luck with men, cars, fines, money” etc..

Problem is, this is not bad luck, it’s poor choices – you are attracting the same situation to yourself because you view yourself as someone that it happens to – and as such you allow it happen.
If you dated 20 men and all 20 of them have turned out to be “Ass holes” – law of maths tells us there is one common denominator here; YOU.

So to really change your mindset you need to start learning one thing – you are accountable for things, and stop looking to off load blame in every direction possible.

Let’s bring this in to a fat loss or transformation journey.
Emily sees herself as a fat person. She is heavily overweight and has no confidence. She KNOWS the right things to do in order to loose weight, and yet she continues to eat junk food and fast food – why?
Because she views herself as “FAT EMILY” and this is just what she does, junk food and lazy days – in her mind it’s happening TO HER not BECAUSE OF HER.

Emily one day goes to the doctor, who tells her she is now at great risk of diabetes and COPD (a heart disorder) which could seriously jeopardise her lifespan over the next 10 years if she doesn’t take action.
Emily has a 4 year old daughter she doesn’t want to leave behind – BOOM, in comes the emotion.
Emily now knows what she has to do and decides to make a plan to do it, but did she suddenly become more educated? – NO, she just changed her mindset and her priorities.

However, here is where the MINDSET game really kicks in. Emily needs to start to BELIEVE in herself as a fit person, even viewing herself as a fit person, understanding that she WILL be a fit person, someone that doesn’t eat junk food – not because she is “on a diet” but because this is her life.

Compare it to a smoker, they decide to give up.
They are at the pub one night and a friend offers them a cigarette.
They reply with “no thanks, I’ve given up.” – EH EH – WRONG!!!
This is still viewing yourself as a smoker who is suffering from a struggle to overcome a problem that happened TO YOU!

Instead, why not say – “no thanks, I’m a non smoker” – BOOM, there is a different person, a different mindset, someone who isn’t going through the struggle of giving up as they are already a NON-SMOKER, someone in control and recognises that a situation happened BECAUSE OF THEM and they are in the power to change it.

Understanding this mindset is SUCH a powerful tool, in fitness, in life, in business, in relationships – everywhere!

To really grasp its concepts is difficult, and can even delve into finding yourself spiritually – for that I would recommend visiting this page: CLICK HERE

I get no commission for this, no referral structure or free sessions – I just want you to really understand what you are worth.

I mean, you were born a miracle. Statistically the chance of you getting here was 400 million to 1!
And yet you’re happy to just “get by” with life, assuming situations will just change or you’re content with less than you are worth.

You are worth more than that – and I certainly hope you start to figure that out soon!

Happy weekend guys,

Much love,


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